Sunday, June 15, 2008

Random...

[Sigh]
I just feel like randomly talking about random things. Very tired.

Hmmmm...
Well yea, I still have Tundae's music on my i-pod and there's this song that is just so beautiful...man, so beautiful.
I can't even explain it.
Geniunely beautiful.
Eminem's song to his daughter:
"Halie's Song".
It's just about how much love he has for his daughter,
And how even though he has all these problems,
just a simple look at his daughter makes his world so much better.
It's beautiful.

I know what he means too.
Because I remember the one day I fought with an old friend of mine,
a lot, and I mean a lot of things went wrong that day ...not just the fight...
I went home and cried my eyes out harder than I had ever cried before and I felt so sad and miserable, never felt worse in my life...I cried really hard for like an hour. One of the worst days of my life....
I went to go pick up my brother from school....
I just looked at him...
and I felt better immediately.

I smiled.

I can't really explain it,
but I just looked at him
and loved that he didn't have any problems like me,
loved that he was so nonchalant about everything,
and loved that he was happy.
Like I previously said, I can't really explain it.
But just one look at him , and my problems flew out the window.

He's the one guy that I truly love.

And for the people out there who don't know,
my brother is like a son to me.
I have helped to raise my brother a lot.
I have done so much for him and sacraficed so much for him.
I've sacraficed my [social] life and even my grades...

But to me it doesn't matter...
If you really love some one, you'd do anything for them without hesitation and without caring about yourself...
It's crazy how you can love some one more than yourself....
Crazy.


And the other day, yesterday to be specific, I was talking with Tundae.
I was just telling him about how I feel about America.
I don't feel like it's "home".
If that makes any sense.
I just feel out of place.
IDK.
Anyways, after college I'm moving out East.
Middle East to be exact.
I think I know which country I'm moving to, but one can never be too sure.
I have never been to the middle east, but I feel like if I ever did it would feel like home.
Blah, Blah, Blah...
I think this whole "I don't feel at home" thing has just resulted from me not knowing where I came from....except having people try to tell me my whole life.
Yeah, I don't think anyone can really identify with what I'm saying except Tundae...

And about him...
he deserves some "credit"...
he's always been a good friend to me ,
[well except once but he's excused from that since I understand why he acted like he did],
but yea, he has always been such a good friend,
I can call him with any problem, he'll listen...
and I don't know who else I can really say that for....
And i'm thankful for him.
But i always wasn't the bestest friend to him,
that I can admit,
and for that I'm sorry.
It was just that when him and her broke up,
we were all bestfriends,
and being the dumbass I am ,
I chose sides.
Unintentionally, of course,
nevertheless I did.
And I chose the wrong side.
Anyways, Tundae, you are such a great friend
and I really don't know what I'd do, or who I'd bitch at
if you weren't around. Love you girl!!!


I feel like I have written enough for right now.
I know my writing is choppy, but my mind thinks faster than I write.=)

And I'm so happy!Alyssa will be working at Cold Stone this summer! Whooo hooo!
And probably Tundae too!
"Donde estan las frescas?"
It's a stupid joke, from a long time ago....

Anyways..
Peace peeps!


p.s.
Lil Wayne, Tha Carter III,
Favorite songs: 3 Peat, A Milli, Phone Home, Got Money...the rest are cool too.=)
P.s. Ab is cool! He keeps me on Earth!

2 comments:

Tundae said...

<3

Dawn said...

coldstones! wootwoot

halies song
im with you on that

funny thing its fathers day too